I'm giving up on certain things, like bicycles and gardening And walking to the grocery store Because the rain has started in my city, and though the greenery is pretty It's not enough to get me out the door 'Tis the season now of grey and brown, of giving up and sitting down, And layering and wooly socks I'm celebrating solitude and eating soup instead of food And never walking more than seven blocks 'Cause I've got cats, and I've got Netflix I've got games, and I've got snack mix And I am gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more I'll have several 5-blanket nights, forget to buy my Christmas flights And procrastinate Halloween And as a consolation prize for heavy clouds that fill the skies There's pumpkin spice in everything Every morning it gets darker out; I'm gonna wear these markers out With all these lists of things I'll never do And when my motivation's gone, I'll order snacks from Amazon And try to knit a scarf for you 'Cause I've got cats, and I've got Netflix I've got games, and I've got snack mix And I am gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more (Cat keyboard solo) 'Cause we've got cats, and we've got Netflix We've got games, and we've got snack mix And we are gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more We've got cats, and we've got Netflix We've got games, and we've got snack mix And we are gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more

I'm a train traveling at 2a + x Got a cargo of nothing except my effects my track isn't laid yet, my plan is still blurry but I'm moving too fast to remember to worry you're a train at point y and you have been for years held in one spot by your justified fears you have some wisdom, trajectory notes But I don't recall ever seeking your vote, no You are not my source I am not your project cause I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object I'm a train tumbling and making mistakes but my choices are mine, and that's why I have brakes collisions, reversals, I keep scraping by I'd rather be wrong than forget how to try I'm a train trying to find my own way you've got a lot of trite nonsense to say there are things that I do, you think should be addressed and you say the word proud when you should say impressed Please get off your horse This is not your project cause I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object You've got tips on locations You've been there before You think I shouldn't be on my own anymore I don't want your tips, I don't care that they're free you've been around, but you've never been me I'm a train exiting all of known space your track's in circles inside that old rat race I don't know where I'm going, though I certainly care If I win or I fail I hope you aren't there if you were creative, productive, or smart if you demonstrated you knew how to art I would listen, but you barely leave your own station You've only got mass, I have acceleration Find your own darn course You are off this project cause I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object

When I wake up on the wrong side of the planet And the creamer for my coffee has gone bad And the people on the streets should really can it 'Cause I don't think they would like me when I'm mad Down at the bottom, I have a secret trick I have a thing to bring me up when I am low It is simple, it's easy, and it's real quick And it went extinct two hundred million years ago Dimetrodon They ate sharks and were 10 feet long Dimetrodon It's a thought that I can count on When my darkest thoughts have got a hold on me I close my eyes and I remember all their giant teeth To shake off all the problems I have piled on I picture the sail-backed giants of Dimetrodon I am walking in a mall or in an airport And I'm filling up with loneliness and fear Like I'm not really a member of this species And I don't think I am special, I'm just weird When I am feeling this, one thing can make me smile There are other folks who never quite fit in They're kind of mammals but they look like reptiles But I bet that difference never bothered them Dimetrodon They ate sharks and were 10 feet long Dimetrodon It's a thought that I can count on When my darkest thoughts have got a hold on me I close my eyes and I remember all their giant teeth To shake off all the problems I have piled on I picture the sail-backed giants of Dimetrodon Be yourself Count on your inner strength Find your people Hunt the weak Dimetrodon Dimetrodon Dimetrodon

It's wonderful to be young We don't have money, but we still have fun The night doesn't start till about 3:30 Go to the club, or go to the party You don't like people and you don't wanna go But your friends are here and you forgot to say "no" So put on mascara so you look awake Try to be social till you need a break There is no reason This shouldn't be fun There's excitement In the air We have our whole lives We have our freedom I don't care I don't care Ennui Ennui On we go On our own Ennui Ennui On we go On our own Wake up in the afternoon, feeling like "why?" You could get up, or you could just cry Your friends are happy and you are bitter Gettin' jealous when you look at Twitter You don't wanna shower so you stay in bed Refresh your mail and get in your head Try to get motivated; tell yourself lies like "You would be happy if you got exercise" It's the weekend You should see your friends Anyone Anywhere Should you go out? Or should you stay in? I don't care I don't care Ennui Ennui On we go On our own

Where did you go, my friend? Where did you go all day? You know that I don't take it well When people go away Where did you go? And why did you abandon me? Where did you go? Please tell me what I did to make you leave I thought that we were friends I don't want you to leave again And so I planned a speech to give to you The moment you got home Here I go Ruff, ruff, ruff Where, oh where did you go? I didn't have you here To throw the ball or scratch my ears So I sat here and I licked various parts of me Ruff, ruff, ruff Where did you go? You left today without a trace And I know because I checked So if you're wondering it's just because I missed you so That your bedroom is a wreck I sat here and I cried and I waited I took a nap and had a snack and I debated How long I'd have to dig To bury stuff under the carpet And I planned the things I'd say when you got home Oh, home Ruff, ruff, ruff Where, oh where did you go? I didn't have you here To throw the ball or scratch my ears So I sat here and I licked various parts of me Ruff, ruff, ruff Ruff, ruff Ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff Bow-wow

Leaving home for the first time You never knew that deals could be so dirty Never seen so many lies People hurting out from the inside You have the strength to save us You have the power to know right from wrong Spread the truth and set the unsteady Men in dark suits tell you people aren't ready You're not a quitter. You still believe The truth's in your lasso, your heart's on your sleeve When we're drowning in darkness, you'll save us all from going under And we'll watch you in wonder Welcome to the dirty world Where they will tell you being strong's not for girls They'll say that your value's being easy on the eyes Crush those people to death with your thighs Men in power aren't who you care about The city's pain stops when you bring the truth out Though your sisters will tell you mankind can't be saved You know that inside the weak can be brave And you're not a quitter. You still believe The truth's in your lasso, your heart's on your sleeve When we're drowning in darkness, you'll save us all from going under And we'll watch you in wonder When they send you away, you know they'll never forget And you'll hover above in your invisible jet When they finally want you, they'll call you back down Pull on your hot pants and put on your crown You're not a quitter. You still believe The truth's in your lasso, your heart's on your sleeve And when we're drowning in darkness, you'll save us all from going under And we'll watch you in wonder

You were told, back in the day, If you don't have anything nice to say to keep quiet. Don't be a jerk, don't devalue the work Someone's done, even if you don't like it I was told, back in the day, You can judge a man by the way that he treats others To find someone nice; there is all this advice So a girl doesn't find herself being used But both you and I resist control And neither of us did the things we were told, and I love you, even though you are an Internet troll There's something about you that I want to know It's the way that you write, so offensive and trite With such passion; it's sort of appealing I love you, even though you're a commenter from Hell The predictable way you don't know how to spell And you're hateful, disgusting, ungrateful Like you don't understand other people have feelings I feel like you don't even know If you don't enjoy a YouTube video You can stop it. You don't have to watch it. Your ignorance is just amazing. It seems like you've never heard That if media doesn't speak your words You can make something new, express your view It's a delight how you're so darn lazy The Internet makes you feel so empowered You almost forget you're a stupid coward I love you, even though you are an Internet troll Online you've got no self-control And the things that you say aren't OK Even when you're anonymous at a distance I love you even though you're a commenter from Hell The magical way you get angry so well And so quickly, you're zero to 60 But I've got admire your persistence We were told, back in the day That if someone's a bully that's because they Are sad with themselves, they're broken and need help And they put others down so that they feel better And yes, that is true I know you are hateful because you completely lack value But I still like you I bet you'd know how to fix my computer It makes you happy when others are sad It's cute how you blame the world for making you feel bad I love you even though you are an Internet troll Even though you're deeply sad and alone And you're mean. You act like you're thirteen Boy, you do wonders for my self-esteem

I’m not very nice I don’t wash my hair I won’t come to your place when your parents are there I won’t call you back I’ll make fun of your friends And after date two I won’t bring flowers again But girl, how could you go? I’m so charming and sensitive everyone knows And babe, I know you won’t leave I’ve got the best trick of all time up my sleeve It’s not hard to play guitar But it’s working for me Yeah, it’s working for me It’s not hard to play guitar But it’s working for me Yeah, it’s working for me If we have a fight And I happen to lose I will turn off my phone and run away from you I’ll probably cheat on you More than two times But I’ll win you back with some torturèd rhymes And girl, I know it will work When I make you feel special, you forget I’m a jerk And your friends think that you scored 'Cause your boyfriend can almost play three different chords It’s not hard to play guitar But it’s working for me Yeah, it’s working for me It’s not hard to play guitar But it’s working for me Yeah, it’s working for me I'm using you for your meal plan and all But Baby, you are my Wonderwall You probably should leave me; I'm just made of slime But I can't talk now, girl; it's closing time It is closing time (nanananana) I wrote you a song (This is it.) (nanananana) Can we go to your place? (nanananana)

(We're gonna be on TableTop this week, so we wrote a song to celebrate.) Yeah, your friend Wil, he’s got a beard and a show It’s TableTop; he makes it with our buddy Bo. We were minding our business when they called us one day— Said, “We want you on the show! Do you wanna come play?” Well, yes, of course, but we’ve gotta brush up We’re behind on games and we don’t wanna look rough How do we practice? Aubrey says: “I know, We’ll play every game they’ve ever played on the show” And we did. We played them, and we played them again. And we’re ready for anything, so bring it on, friend 'Cause we know these board games from A to Z And you can bring your best, but you won’t beat the DCs We’re playin' TableTop games Who’s ready for some TableTop games? You wanna try Tsuro? We’ll wipe the floor with you And in Munchkin we’ll kick down a door with you “What’s next?” it’s Get Bit by Dave Chalker You’ll lose so many limbs that you’ll fit in a locker You’ll want a Ticket to Ride out of this room When we’re racking up points in Keith Baker’s Gloom Hey, that Elder Sign’s broken; bro, can you fix it? It should say we crushed you at Dixit And Small World: you thought this would be fun? Our skills are so rad, we could win in round one You have Alhambra; did you bring Zombie Dice? We don’t need to cheat but we won’t play nice, 'cuz We’re playin' TableTop games Who’s ready for some TableTop games? When we’re done playing Settlers of Catan You'll forget how to pronounce "Carcassonne" Castle Panic? That’s co-op, for us that’s a cage We’d rather send you back to the Dragon Age It’s a Fiasco. You can cry or Say Anything It's the Last Night On Earth and we’re in it to a win a thing. It’s a Pandemic. I’d Wager your Wits are weak If you think you’re ready to step to Chez Geek. We’re playin' TableTop games Who’s ready for some TableTop games? Doubleclicks, why you doin' this Taking a good friendship and ruining it Man, I thought I was cool with this Deckbuilding, role playing, and I’m rolling some dice They made me bet all my money, and made me pledge my life Because I showed up with Monopoly When Angela and Aubrey gave me an instruction book and a glossary And I guess I lost, see, that’s what they’re telling me So never mess with the Double-C’s at the double T, it’s trouble see (Oh, honey. That was only Season 1.) Once upon a time you thought you could win But now you’re Smashed Up—that’s a game by Paul Peterson Let’s get you rested up and Qwirkle in you And check your Resistance on games for Season 2 There are shadows over Camelot and Tsuro in the Seas And we are the ones with the Fortune and Glory Takenoko time, we’ll eat your bamboo And in Formula D, a winner’s not you How about King of Tokyo, do you like Japan? I think you’ll find for you, it’s a Forbidden Island Star Wars X-Wing and Star Trek Catan Lords of Vegas and Waterdeep, just bring it right on 'Cause in 12 Days you’ll be blabbin' Unspeakable Words By my friends James and Mike, some of my favorite nerds You wanna be our friend too? I don’t think that you will When you’re getting Betrayed at the House on the Hill We’re playin' TableTop games Who’s ready for some TableTop games? So we got to the studio, time to make TV They have lights, they’ve got cameras, and my sister and me And we played a game! So how did it go? I guess you’ll have to watch the episode if you wanna know We’re playin' TableTop games Who’s ready for some TableTop games? We’re playin' TableTop games Who’s ready for some TableTop?

Leaves grow on the trees each spring And in winter fall to the ground again If I were a leaf, I'd grow on a tree If you were a leaf then you would dump me. There's nothing wrong with me; you just broke my heart Now hold me close so I don't fall apart There's a perfect metaphor for what you did to me: You are the changing seasons; I'm a guy in shorts heading for the sea You are a thunder cloud and I'm an outdoor wedding with a nonrefundable fee You are Godzilla, baby... and I'm just me There's nothing wrong with me; you just broke my heart Now hold me close so I don't fall apart You took my heart to Goodwill and you left it outside You put my love in a farm upstate You took my heart to the park and you told it to hide With no plans to seek it; that's great And now I'm ready Ready to destroy you There's nothing wrong with me; you just broke my heart Now hold me close so I don't punch your face

You are cool and smart and nice You’re the beans to my rice You don’t have to ask me twice I love you so much I love you like a burrito oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh Ask me about my favorite stuff It's not mean and it's not tough It should be easy to be in love I love you so much I love you like a burrito oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh Like a space-age food pod made of magic and dreams I'm a happy girl because I have you on my team I like candy and I like wine I like it that you are mine You are sweet and you are fine I love you so much I love you like a burrito oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh A tortilla is a hug made out of flour I want to see your face every single hour