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Some Christmas Songs

by The Doubleclicks

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So this is the future—tomorrow is today We have airplanes, we have spaceships We have iPads taped to segways. I don’t miss the jet packs, I’m not waiting for my hoverboard I don’t need no stupid gadgets, cause there’s something I want more… The ability to make sexist assholes disappear Is all I want for christmas, it’s all I want this year I’m done with catcalls and with shaming They’ve had their chance to learn, but the patriarchy’s bullshit And I want to watch it burn And we’ll sing ding ding dong Ring the bells and sing the song Cause the dudes who called us sluts are all long gone We’ll sing ding dong ding Call the children let them sing Aexist bullshit ends with us this christmas They don’t have to die, this doesn’t have to hurt But by 8 on christmas morning I want these fuckers off my earth There’s a time for reasoned argument, In fact, it would be wiser But it’s christmas, and I’m right and I want a sexist pulverizer Santa may not have one, but I am gonna try Oh, do I seem too mad to you? God, I wonder why. I like Christmas, I like presents, baby jesus seems ok But throw him in the garbage and I’d be just fine today Just give me a magic weapon that puts sexists in their place That’s what I’ll be wishing for when I am saying grace And we’ll sing ding ding dong Ring the bells and sing the song As the blood of our oppressors floods the streets We’d sing ding dong ding Call the children let them sing Sexist bullshit ends with us this christmas


released December 17, 2014

We have written a few Christmas songs, here they are in one place.




The Doubleclicks Portland, Oregon

The Doubleclicks - Laser Malena-Webber and Aubrey Turner, also known as musical duo the Doubleclicks write songs about dinosaurs, cats, anxiety, and queer feelings on the cello and guitar, and welcome you to imagine the name of that genre. Their latest project is a musical, "Teaching a Robot to Love," which is a sci-fi story about the trans experience. ... more

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