My prom was awesome I have no regrets
Now that the Catholics all have empty nests I can tell you honestly 
it was all gay as hell

I don't know who invented the bottle that spins
but I know it’s a fun game that everyone wins
when you play it with closeted queers it’s a love carousel

when nobody thinks that it’s real to be bi
your hometown gets filled up with all sorts of lies
I’m sorry for all the straight roles that I failed at portraying

but Lord grant me patience and Hugh Grant me grace
i never knew love til I looked in their face
when they told me with tears in their eyes that this wasn’t just playing

that isn’t what happened but it’s what I remember
don’t tell the host I don’t want to offend her
but I’ve never felt stronger while loving so tender
and we tried so hard but we were still wrong about gender

bicycle / pancake / omnipotent / queer
pick a prefix that fits you I’m glad you’re still here
Me and God hate the people who tell you your feelings are fake

But the first person who made me feel good to be tall
Who made me feel real in a whole way at all
wore the wrong kind of clothes that TV told me I should be right for

gay weddings in Boston showed it was ok
if I hadn’t known that I might not be here today
so let’s try telling kids that their joy is a thing we will fight for

that isn’t what happened but that’s what I remember
when we started telling truths at the end of december
we made the worst daiquiris ever to spill from a blender
and we tried to learn but we were so wrong about gender