you were told, back in the day if you don't have anything nice to say to keep quiet. Don't be a jerk, don't devalue the work someone's done, even if you don't like it I was told, back in the day you can judge a man by the way that he treats others, to find someone nice there is all this advice so a girl doesn't find herself being used but both you and I resist control and neither of us did the things we were told and I love you, even though you are an internet troll there's something about you that I want to know it's the way that you write so offensive and trite with such passion it's sort of appealing I love you, even though you're a commenter from hell the predictable way you don't know how to spell and you're hateful disgusting, ungrateful like you don't understand, other people have feelings I feel like you don't even know if you don't enjoy a youtube video you can stop it. you don't have to watch it. your ignorance is just amazing. it seems like you've never heard that if media doesn't speak your words you can make something new, express your view it's a delight how you're so darn LAZY the internet makes you feel so empowered you almost forget you're a stupid coward I love you, even though you are an internet troll online you've got no self-control the things that you say aren't OK even when you're anonymous at a distance I love you even though you're a commenter from hell the magical way you angry so well and so quickly, you're zero to 60 But I've got admire your persistence We were told, back in the day that if someone's a bully that's because they are sad with themselves, they're broken and need help and they put others down so they feel better and yes, that is true I know you are hateful because you completely lack value but I still like you I bet you'd know how to fix my computer It makes you happy when others are sad It's cute how you blame the world for making you feel bad I love you even though you are an internet troll even though you're deeply sad and alone and you're mean you act like you're thirteen boy, you do wonders for my self-esteem

When I wake up on the wrong side of the planet and the creamer for my coffee has gone bad and the people on the streets should really can it cause I don't think they would like me when I'm mad Down at the bottom, I have a secret trick I have a thing to bring me up when I am low it's simple and it's easy and it's real quick and it went extinct two hundred million years ago Dimetrodon They ate sharks and were 10 feet long Dimetrodon it's a thought that I can count on When my darkest thoughts have got a hold on me I close my eyes and I remember all their giant teeth to shake off all the problems I've piled on I picture the sail-backed giants of Dimetrodon I am walking in a mall or in an airport and I'm filling up with loneliness and fear like I'm not really a member of this species and I don't think I am special, I'm just weird when I am feeling this, one thing will make me smile there are other folks who never quite fit in they're kinda mammals but they look like reptiles but I bet that difference never bothered them Dimetrodon They ate sharks and were 10 feet long Dimetrodon it's a thought that I can count on When my darkest thoughts have got a hold on me I close my eyes and I remember all their giant teeth to shake off all the problems I have piled on I picture the sail-backed giants of Dimetrodon be yourself count on your inner strength find your people hunt the weak Dimetrodon They ate sharks and were 10 feet long Dimetrodon it's a thought that I can count on When my darkest thoughts have got a hold on me I close my eyes and I remember all their giant teeth to shake off all the problems I have piled on I picture the sail-backed giants of Dimetrodon Dimetrodon, Dimetrodon

I'm giving up on certain things like bicycles and gardening and walking to the grocery store because the rain has started in the city and though the greenery is pretty it's not enough to get me out the door 'tis the season now of grey and brown/ of giving up and sitting down and layering and woo-ly socks I'm celebrating solitude and eating soup instead of food and never walking more than seven blocks Cause I've got cats, and I've got netflix I've got games, and I've got snack mix and I am gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more I'll have several 5-blanket nights, forget to buy my christmas flights and procrastinate halloween as a consolation prize, for heavy clouds that fill the skies there's pumpkin spice in everything Every morning it gets darker out, I'm gonna wear these markers out with all these lists of things I'll never do And when my motivation's gone, I'll order snacks from Amazon and try to knit a scarf for you Cause I've got cats, and I've got netflix I've got games, and I've got snack mix and I am gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more I've got plans, I'm gonna make things If I get hungry, I might even bake things they say fall is only passing through but I don't really want it to Cause we've got cats, and we've got netflix We've got games, and we've got snack mix and we are gonna stay indoors for 4 or 5 months or more

Leaving home for the first time You never knew that deals could be so dirty Never seen so many lies People hurting out from the inside you have the strength to save us you have the power to know right from wrong spread the truth and set the unsteady but men in dark suits tell you that people aren't ready but you're not a quitter. You still believe the truth's in your lasso, your heart's on your sleeve when we're drowning in darkness you'll save us all from going under and we'll watch you in Wonder welcome to the dirty world where they will will tell you being strong's not for girls they'll say that your value is to be easy on the eyes crush those people to death with your thighs Men in power aren't who you care about the city's pain stops when you bring the truth out though your sisters will tell you mankind can't be saved you know that inside the weak can be brave and you're not a quitter. You still believe the truth's in your lasso, your heart's on your sleeve when we're drowning in darkness you'll save us all from going under and we'll watch you in Wonder when they send you away, you know they'll never forget And you'll hover above in your invisible jet when they finally you they'll call you back down pull on your hot pants and put on your crown cause you're not a quitter. You still believe the truth's in your lasso, your hearts on your sleeve when we're drowning in darkness you'll save us all from going under and we'll watch you in Wonder

Mushroom clouds rise, acid rain falls there aren't any footsteps these days it's been thirteen hours since the crushing defeat and the last ones turned dust and fillets I am all alone, there is no one else living it's a tragedy, but I'll get past it I'll try to look on the bright side today Finally, I am the fastest I'll try to look on the bright side today Finally, I am the fastest After three decades of nuclear fallout and galaxy-wide laser war the evacuation was mostly complete and then came the poisonous spores Now they're all gone, I've been left here to die but my plan is to outlast it Now that there's no one to get in my way finally, I am the fastest Now that there's no one to get in my way Finally, I am the fastest they used to tease me, giggle and yell because I was always last place But the radiation bounced right off my shell I guess slow and steady ended up winning the race I'll try to look on the bright side today Finally, I am the fastest

Felis catus is your taxonomic nomenclature, An endothermic quadruped, carnivorous by nature; Your visual, olfactory, and auditory senses Contribute to your hunting skills and natural defenses. I find myself intrigued by your subvocal oscillations, A singular development of cat communications That obviates your basic hedonistic predilection For a rhythmic stroking of your fur to demonstrate affection. A tail is quite essential for your acrobatic talents; You would not be so agile if you lacked its counterbalance. And when not being utilized to aid in locomotion, It often serves to illustrate the state of your emotion. O Spot, the complex levels of behavior you display Connote a fairly well-developed cognitive array. And though you are not sentient and do not comprehend, I nonetheless consider you a true and valued friend.

I'm a train traveling at 2a + x Got a cargo of nothing except my effects my track isn't laid yet, my plan is still blurry but I'm moving too fast to remember to worry you're a train at point y and you have been for years held in one spot by your justified fears you have some wisdom, trajectory notes But I don't recall ever seeking your vote, no You are not my source I am not your project cause I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object I'm a train tumbling and making mistakes but my choices are mine, and that's why I have brakes collisions, reversals, I keep scraping by I'd rather be wrong than forget how to try I'm a train trying to find my own way you've got a lot of trite nonsense to say there are things that I do, you think should be addressed and you say the word proud when you should say impressed Please get off your horse This is not your project I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object You've got tips on locations You've been there before You think I shouldn't be on my own anymore I don't want your tips, I don't care that they're free you've been around, but you've never been me I'm a train exiting all of known space your track's in circles inside that old rat race I don't know where I'm going, though I certainly care If I win or I fail I hope you aren't there if you were creative, productive, or smart if you demonstrated you knew how to art I would listen, but you barely leave your own station You've only got mass, I have acceleration Find your own darn course You are off this project I'm an unstoppable force and you're an immovable object

We're driving through the desert on our desert bus It's gonna take awhile, so come with us We're driving through the desert on our desert bus We hope we'll get there someday. We started off in Tucson, and we are Vegas-bound The scenery is barren, with no trees or lights or sounds No, we can't take a little break no matter how you feel I know you're hungry, bored, and tired, but I have got the wheel. And we're driving through the desert on our desert bus It's gonna take awhile, so come with us We're driving through the desert on our desert bus We hope we'll get there someday. The bus needs alignment, it's pulling to the right But we've got to get there, so we'll drive through the night Through the night We're driving through the desert on our desert bus It's gonna take awhile, so come with us We're driving through the desert on our desert bus We hope we'll get there someday. We hope we'll get there someday. We hope we'll get there someday.

Iron Man could charm the pants off of a snorlax Thor’s abs could basically kill Captain America is cute like a kitten And Black Widow has specific skills But if I had to choose just one Out of all the heroes in that field You can keep your Hawkeye & Loki But I’ll take an agent of SHIELD Agent Coulson doing the work that no one sees Agent Coulson keeping it cool behind the scenes you are super you are super to me Paperwork and complication Ties and suits and Iron Man He’d say things like “I’m just doing my job, m’am. you need to run while you still can” I bet his plane always has cell service and he’d always text a witty reply He’s reliable and devoted And apparently he can’t die Agent Coulson doing the work that no one sees Agent Coulson keeping it cool behind the scenes you are super you are super to me I bet you wish you had a different job it’s not too fun being the guy that’s sane Someone else could do the paperwork for once And you could be the guy jumping out of the plane Agent Coulson doing the work that no one sees Agent Coulson keeping it cool behind the scenes you are super you are super to me

When I was 6 I wore a red-and-white dress and the neighbor kids called me minnie mouse But the neighbor kids were the only ones I was allowed to invite to my house So my friends would be my friends, as long as we were not at school where they’d treat me like garbage to make them seem cool And I’m bitter, I’m still a little bit bitter… In middle school my parents thought I should hang out with kids who weren’t so male And then some girls tried to lock me in a bathroom while they watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail - and after 10 years, most-of-me has grown up and moved on - but a little bit still wants them to admit that they were wrong And that’s not helping, it’s really not helping I still hear the voices saying no one likes me And sometimes I believe them, even now I can’t forget the taste of that pain and that fear but I dilute those bad memories with more good ones every year and I’m bitter, but it is over I spent my high school years overcompensating for my insecurity and that was lame I burnt more bridges than a retreating army, and I was lonely, and I had myself to blame And senior year, my boyfriend told me that my friends didn’t really like me, it was just pretended… and that hurt, he was kind of a jerk I try to live my life without regrets And I try pretty hard to just forget because it doesn’t help to think about all my young strife I know that I’m great today because of that hell but I think I could have been a happy kid as well And still made something positive out of my life I still hear the voices saying no one likes me And sometimes I believe them, even now I can’t forget the taste of that pain and that fear but I dilute those bad memories with more good ones every year and I’m bitter, but it is over But there’s nobody flawless who can cast the first stone I’ve got a bucket full of rocks here that are never getting thrown I can picture the classroom where I made a girl cry I don't remember how I did it and I don't remember why But a bully isn’t thinking, she’s an anger-feelings blur and like a snake, she's more afraid of you than you could be of her and that doesn’t make it better, doesn’t make it right I still hear the voices saying no one likes me And sometimes I believe them, even now I can’t forget the taste of that pain and that fear but I dilute those bad memories with more good ones every year and I’m sorry, and I’m glad it is over

I’m not very nice I don’t wash my hair I won’t come to your place when your parents are there I won’t call you back I’ll make fun of your friends and after date two I won’t bring flowers again But girl. how could you go? I’m so charming and sensitive everyone knows and babe, I know you won’t leave I’ve got the best trick of all time up my sleeve It’s not hard to play guitar, but it’s working for me, yeah, it’s working for me If we have a fight and I happen to lose I will turn off my phone and run away from you I’ll probably cheat on you more than two times But I’ll win you back with some torturéd rhymes And girl, I know it will work when I make you feel special you forget I’m a jerk and your friends think that you scored cause your boyfriend can almost play three different chords It’s not hard to play guitar, but it’s working for me, yeah, it’s working for me I wrote you a song (nanananana) it goes like this (nanananana) I’m the perfect man (nanananana)

On the day before the day before Christmas There's a friend of a friend of a friend With a ride to the train to the airport with the gifts you'd forgotten to send you've never been so good at all this hurry up and wait And you almost miss your flights while online shopping at the gate Merry Christmas to everyone who's joining us at gate 30 tonight and Happy Holidays too there's a line for the line for the airplane there's a sports team and some kind of band you look in your bag for your ticket it's always been right in your hand And they're trying to explain why there might be a delay and you never could be worried about time on holidays (CHORUS) The pilot's got a music chip in his tie and he's making it sing deck the halls it's somebody's very first airplane ride she makes a lot of noise for being so small On the day before the day after New year's to the plane from the gate from the car you text your goodbyes as you're boarding and they're trying to check your guitar And it's not so very festive, riding airplanes all alone but it's the only way of celebrating that you've known Merry Christmas to everyone who's joining us at gate 30 tonight and Happy Holidays too